Wednesday, March 28, 2012


My philosophy with my mother is you can't live with her, you can't live without her. I am an only child of divorced parents. I could probably leave things right there are I can assume the first thought through your head is, oh my over protected.

My mother and I have a love hate relationship. She has always made me feel like I am never a good enough daughter, that I don't spend enough time with her, that I don't make her feel loved. She has always been super overprotective, and I get it, and I humored her. She knew my every move, literally, because I would have to call and let the phone ring once when I arrived and when I left to come home. Growing up was very tough, but I get it, you have to be in this day and age. Maybe not as neurotic, to the point where you would like to like your child up in a room to protect them, but I get it.

What I don't get is that since I got married almost 5 years ago, how much more controlling she has tried to become. Since my husband is in the military, he does go away on occasion. If she finds out, she expects me to pack up my dogs and come stay with her ( I live 10 minutes from her) or she wants to come stay here. I am usually okay with that, but there are some days that I really would like to be able to stay in my own home, by myself, and enjoy the peace and quiet. She knows my teaching schedule and if I haven't called her by what she thinks is a respectable amount of time for me to be finished, she is blowing up every telephone line she can. If I don't talk to her at least 4 times a day, I don't love her. If I don't come and see her at least once a week I am the worst daughter in the world and just like my father ( I just love that one, and hey I am glad I am like him because I am not a clingy freak!).

Our conversations, more than not, always end up with me holding the phone away from my ear, her grumbling about how horrible I am, I roll my eyes, and slam the phone down when she hangs up on me, cursing at her under my breath. My poor husband just sits there and listens and laughs. He just can't understand how my mom can be this way, especially when I normally drop everything to go do something for her.

Maybe if she would be back off and let me live my life instead of running it, I would want to spend time with her and have things to talk to her about.  I love my mother with all my heart. I would love to be able to have a cool mother/daughter relationship with her. Maybe if she worked, had a hobby (other than me) or had a boyfriend, she would be occupied with other things. Speaking of which I think I may secretly put her on!!!!

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